Title: A Normal Life
Author: Agent Diana Fowley
Feedback: I love it!Please feed me! agtdianafowley@yahoo.com
Archieve: Just let me know
Spoilers: Everything through Requiem
Category: MSR, post episode
Keywords: MSR, Scully/Doggett friendship, Doggett and Mulder alternating POV
Rating: R

Summary: Doggett and Mulder's POV of Mulder's return.

Author's notes: I love Doggett. I really do. I think he is awesome and I think that he is the perfect partner for Scully. I also have to say that I am a die hard shipper and want Mulder and Scully to end up together and I think that Scully's baby is Mulder's. Please keep that in mind as you read this story. The beginning may not be that shipper friendly but I promise everything turns out okay in the end.

Special Thanks: I have to give a huge thanks to my beta readers Holly and mramos. You guys made my story at least tens times better!

Visit my archive http://www.geocities.com/agtdianafowley/index.html


The first thing I notice is the light. The second is the warmth. Those two sensations combine to tell me that I am no longer on the ship. I don't know where exactly I am, but I don't care. I know I'm not with them. I know I am safe, and the feeling of safety is enough allow me to return to a state of unconsciousness.


"Agent Doggett," she says, her face showing her confusion as to my presence at her apartment.

"Good evening, Agent Scully," I say as she steps aside to let me enter. Once inside, I take in my surroundings. It is pretty close to how I imagined it. It's soft and feminine and impeccably clean. I don't know why I think of her that way, soft and feminine I mean. I've heard the rumors. I know that other agents think that she is as hard as steel. But from the first time I met her, I knew that she wasn't. I knew she wasn't the Ice Queen that everyone said she was.

"Can I get you anything?Coffee?" she asks as she motions for me to make myself comfortable on her big, overstuffed sofa.

"Coffee would be great," I say with a smile. "If it's not too much trouble."

"It's decaf," she warns with a face that tells me how revolting she thinks decaf is. I would have to agree but it will do in a pinch.

"Sounds great," I offer, my voice betraying my true feeling on her coffee of choice. As she heads into her kitchen I consider her again. She is definitely an enigma. One that I am sure will take years to figure out. For instance, why decaf coffee?She obviously doesn't like it. Since the time we met, she seems to have warmed up to me. I know she didn't trust me at first. I was a constant reminder of Agent Mulder. After all, the only reason I entered her life was because he disappeared.

She doesn't even ask me how I like my coffee. I have to admit, I'm touched that she knows. I take the brief time it takes for her to walk back to me, to admire her. She is wearing loose gray sweat pants, the kind the aren't fitted at the bottom, a small, tight T-shirt that says 'Graceland' and a gray zippered-hooded sweatshirt, which is hanging open. She looks like a college girl, not a seasoned FBI agent.

"So," she says after taking a moment to get comfortable in the armchair across from the sofa, tucking her bare feet underneath her. "What brings you by, Agent Doggett?If it was a case, it could have waited until tomorrow."

"John," I say. "Please, call me John, especially if we're not on company time. I'm not really a fan of my last name."

For some unknown reason she smiles at this. Just a momentary pull at the corners or her mouth, and I realize that I think that's the first time I have ever seen her smile. I am struck by the fact that it makes her ten times more beautiful.

"Okay, John," she says. "What brings you here?"

"Actually, Agent Scully, I was concerned when Kimberly told me that you would be out of the office today. I hoped nothing was wrong and just wanted to check and make sure."

She takes a moment to consider me, and I, again, wonder what is going on in her head.

"First of all, John," she says in her no-nonsense, I'm-about-to-kick-your-ass-voice, which cause me to reconsider the wisdom of my unplanned visit. Then she continues, "call me Dana."

"All right, Dana," I say, with a smile of relief.

"Second of all, I'm sorry I worried you. I had some appointments I needed to attend."

She says it in such a way, that I have a gut feeling they were more than just appointments. What was she doing?Meeting contacts?Researching cases? Something she didn't trust me to know about?

"Agent....Dana....I'm your partner, and you may not like that. Hell, I know you don't like that. But I feel you owe it to me to keep me informed on whatever 'appointments' you may have. Last time I checked, we were a team and I don't appreciate being left in the dark..."

"They were doctor's appointments, Agent Doggett," she says setting her coffee on the table. "I didn't ditch you, if that's what you think. I had to see a couple of doctors today, so I took the day off. Is that okay?"

I felt like an idiot. She hadn't ditched me. She was just at some doctor's appointments. "I'm sorry about that. I just....Are you okay?I mean it's not complications from that slug-thing is it?"

She seems to soften. Then she picks up her mug and heads to the kitchen. "No," she says, her voice cracking with emotion. "No, I...I just needed to make sure everything was still okay," she says, her voice back under control. She sags back against her counter and stares toward the window. Snow has begun to fall.

She looks so tired. I think she has looked tired, since the day we met. The only way I have any sort of comparison is in those few rare moments in pursuit of Mulder, when she seemed so full of energy and life. Unfortunately those have been short lived and far between.

"Listen, Dana," I say, as I rise from the sofa and join her in her kitchen. "I hope everything is okay and that I see you in the office tomorrow morning. I'm really sorry about the confusion. I was just worried, like I said, and I wanted to make sure everything was okay. I should be going before the snow gets worse."

She turns and looks at me. She seems so deflated that I just want to pull her into my arms and rescue her from all of her pain. Instead I say, "Goodnight," and let myself out, not waiting for her response.


I feel myself getting better everyday. I haven't been able to open my eyes but I am starting to notice sounds. My mind becomes less murky with every moment that passes.

I have been in this state of semi-consciousness for a long time today. Usually, it last a short time and then I fade back into nothingness. I listen to the sounds around me and determine that I must be in a hospital.

I try to move, but I find that I can't. My arms and legs feel like they weigh a ton. I try to open my eyes and find the same thing. I need to do something. I need to let someone know I'm here and aware.

Then it hits me. I need Scully.


I am just about to order lunch and turn on the football game, when I hear a knock at my door. I open it to find Dana Scully, standing there balancing a pizza and a 6 pack of beer. She looks wonderful, in her jeans and tight fitting turtle neck sweater.

"Can I come in?" she asks.

"Only because you brought food and beer," I say as I move aside so she can step by.

She immediately heads for my couch and puts the pizza and the beer on my coffee table.

"I'll get us some plates," I say as I head into the kitchen. When I turn around, I see that she's followed me in and is looking around.

"Could I get a glass of water as well?" she asks.

I nod and hand her the plates. She returns to the couch and I join her shortly after with her water. I stand there for a moment, not knowing were to sit. It would make more sense to sit next to her so we could share the pizza but I worry that it may feel too....intimate.

She must sense my struggle because she looks up at me and then pats the seat next to her. I hand her the water and join her on the couch.

After we dig into the pizza I turn to her and say, "So, Agent Scully, what brings you here?"

She grabs the remote and flips on the football game while she chews. "Football and pizza," she says.

I shake my head no and say, "I don't think I'm buying it."

She looks at me and smiles. It's a full smile, with teeth. "You are a good investigator, aren't you?"

"I don't like to brag..." I say with a smile of my own.

"If you must know, I did come for the football, but brought the rest as a peace offering. I'm sorry about how I treated you on Thursday. I know you were just concerned and jumping to easy conclusions," she continues to look at me, and I consider what she's said.

"Apology accepted," I say between bites of pizza.

She seems relieved and begins to attack her pizza with gusto. For as small as she is, she can sure put it away.

I grab a beer, twist off the top and offer it to her."No," she says with a shake of her head, "I don't drink anymore." Instead she raises her water and clinks it against my beer.

We sit and watch the game until half time, neither of us really saying anything aside from comments about the game and the players and a few colorful ones about the parentage of the referees. I didn't know she had it in her. I must say I am impressed by her knowledge of the game. I know that it's sexist to say, but most women just don't really enjoy football, especially not enough to know as much about is as she does.

"Peripheral vision, John," she reminds me, and I feel the color rushing to my cheeks. I turn my attention away from her and back to the screen.

"I have two brothers and grew up with a father that was a football nut. When he was home he loved to watch the game. I liked spending time with him. I guess I just got hooked."

I turn towards her on the couch, loving this small insight into her life, "Was he gone a lot?Your father?"

She turns towards me, her eyes lost in her reminiscing. "He was in the Navy, a captain," she says with a smile.

I nod and admire the way the blue of her sweater seems to make her hair glow and her eyes sparkle.

The blare of the half-time show begins, and she grabs the remote and mutes the TV. Then she turns to fully face me. "I had to see my oncologist and another doctor on Thursday. The tests wear me out so I just took the rest of the day off."

"Oncologist? Do you.....?"

"I'm in remission. I had a nasopharagial mass. It was inoperable with zero chance of survival. I had gone into the hospital to die a few years ago, and Mulder saved me with a remarkable piece of technology. It was a chip that is implanted in the back of my neck. We don't know exactly how it worked or what will happen if it's damaged or removed. So after the slug..."

Wow. I had no idea. I didn't know what to say. So I just nodded. Finally, I regain my ability to speak, "Is everything okay?I mean with that and the other appointment?"

She smiles another smile with teeth. "Yes," she says, and I think I can see tears forming in her eyes.

"Everything's fine."

"Good," I say. "That's good." Then I say, "I'm really glad that you felt like you could tell me. It makes me feel more like your partner and your friend."

"I hope we can be both."

"Well," I say. "Only if you keep treating me to lunch."

She laughs and I can't help but joining her. "You should do that more," I say after the laughing has died down.

"What?" she asks.

"Laugh and smile, you look so beautiful when you do."

Then she is silent. So am I. I can't believe I just said that and admitted that to her.

She considers me for a moment. Her big blue eyes questioning what she just heard. I can't decide what she's going to do. Finally, she drops her eyes to her lap and says, "Really?"

Her admission is so sadly honest that I can't help but scoot closer to her and lift her eyes to mine, with a hand under her chin. Then I do something I swore I would never do. I kiss her.

I brush my lips against hers and trail my fingers along her chin and down her neck to her shoulder. I pull back and wait for her retreat. When she doesn't move, I lean forward and kiss her again. This time, I make sure it isn't just a brush. My lips make full contact with hers. Then, something amazing happens....she kisses me back. Her lips move against mine, only for a moment. Then, she pulls back and turns her head back toward the television.

"Games back on," she says not leaning away from me, but not turning back either. I release her and lean back. She doesn't look at me but does the same as well. Finally, I un-mute the game and lean back against the couch, but I can't keep my eyes off of her. So, I watch her from the corner of my eye. I don't know what to do. Should I apologize?I wasn't sorry so I couldn't do that. Finally, she leans back against the couch and concentrates on the game.

"Dana?" I finally say and she turns to look at me.

"Umm, can I get you anything?More to drink?"

She smiles and shakes her head no. Then, she does something else that amazes me. She leans toward me and rests her head on my shoulder. I wrap my arm around her and pull her against me. We watch the rest of the game like that, never again mentioning what had happened between us.


Scully!I scream in my head. I have to get to her. I have to see her. I have to touch her. I need her. I need her here with me. I need to apologize for being such an asshole to her. Where is she?Why hasn't she come. Where am I?She must not know where I am. Scully!Please, I need you. Please hear me. I need you here with me. I need to know that you're okay, especially after what's happened between us! Scully!Scully!

Then I hear it. I hear a voice I hadn't heard in a long time, a voice I barely recognize. I hear my voice as I call out her name, "Scully!Scully!"

"Sir?Sir?" I hear a female voice say. It's not her so I call for her again.

"Sir?Can you hear me?Can you open your eyes? Sandy, page Dr. Hays and get him down here. Tell him that John Doe is waking up."

"Scully!" I yell one more time before I slip back into unconsciousness.


After her confession last week, the call from Georgetown Memorial really shook me up. Whoever I was speaking to simply told me to get there as soon as I could because my partner needed me.

When I arrive I find her in intensive care staring through an observation window. I approach her and stop just behind her, not looking through the glass, instead concentrating on her. She is still in the suit she was wearing today. As usual she looks exhausted. I doubt many people besides me would notice.

Surprisingly, after our kis,s nothing has been weird. We still fight. She is still a bit weary of me and nothing else has happened between us. Well, not exactly nothing. We have been spending a lot more time together, off the clock. I think she is lonely and I am a poor substitute for her best friend, but I enjoy our time together so I don't mind. We've gone to dinner, ordered in, watched Monday Night Football, I even popped for a real, in the theater movie, but mostly we've talked. We've talked about life, dreams and goals. We've talked about our families, friends and loved ones. She's filled me in on some of the X-Files, some of the things she's seen and some of the things that have happened to her. The one thing we have never discussed is him....Mulder.

I finally follow her gaze into the observation window and guess who I see lying before me, a tangle of tubes, surrounded by the noises of many monitors.

"There was a message on my machine when I got home from work," she says without even acknowledging my presence. "He has been in and out of consciousness. When he is awake all he does is scream my name......" Her voice is choked with emotion. I lay my hand on her shoulder and wait for her to continue.

"He has been here for almost a week. He was found in a field by a farmer. He has no ID and was listed as John Doe until about 6:30 when I arrived. They must have called every Scully in the area. My mom got a message too," she pauses and looks up at him and lays her hand against the glass.

"I know it's only been a few months, but I had pretty much given up hope. The investigation was still open but no more leads were coming. You were assigned to the X-Files instead of finding him. It just took too much strength to keep the hope alive...." She drops her hand from the window and whispers, "I'm so sorry, Mulder."

She is in such pain. I just want to pull her into my arms, but I feel there is more. I look at him, at the man that has caused her so much pain and pray they he comes out of this so she doesn't have to grieve his loss all over again.

She drops her head to her chest and I step beside her, my hand still resting on her shoulder, offering her the little comfort she will allow. "Dana..."

"I'm pregnant," she says, a smile breaking across her face so fast that I barley notice it. She just shocked the hell out of me.

Then she does it again. She finally turns to me, looks me in the eyes and says, "He doesn't know. He was taken before I knew for sure. Oh God, John, he doesn't know."

I pull her against me and let her tears soak the thin material of my dress shirt.


Okay, I reason with myself; I can do this. I can. I can open my eyes. It takes everything I have in me but, finally, I am successful. I open them a crack and I am immediately assaulted by the light so they snap shut. After minutes of trying, I finally get them to say open. Everything is cloudy, but I can make out shapes and see as much color as I am capable of.

I see the ceiling hanging above me. I hear the beeps and clicks of the machines around me. Finally I get my head to cooperate and turn to see the most beautiful sight in the world. I see Scully. I try to yell for but can't. Then I see what is going on. She is being pulled into the embrace of some man. A tall man in a suit. He is touching her, running his hands up and down her back, placing kisses in her hair. The worst part is that she is touching him too. Her arms are wrapped around his body, keeping him against her.

I fell sick. I feel like I am going to cry. The I slip back into unconsciousness.


I lead her to an empty section of the cafeteria with strict instructions to be notified if he regains consciousness. After I set her down, I grab two coffees and head back to her. "It's decaf.," I say as I set it down before her, and she smiles.

After a comfortable silence she says, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, John. I just didn't feel right telling anyone else before him."

"Anyone else?"

"My mother and Skinner know."

"No apology necessary, Dana. It acutely explains a lot."

She gives me a puzzled expression over her cup of coffee and I continue, "The decaf, the alcohol, the other doctor's appointment, the reason you had to stay so long in the hospital after that first case..."

She nods and we again share a silence. I have so many questions, so many things I think I understand but need to confirm. I just don't know if I should ask. I don't want to push her any further. We've come a long way this week.

My curiosity finally gets the best of me and I ask, "Is he...?"

"Yes," she says with a single nod in the affirmative.

"I guess I didn't realize that you two were together."

"We weren't," she says.

"In that case, if you don't mind be asking, how...."

She smiles at me and I stop mid sentence, "Once is all it takes, John," she says in explanation. Then the smile fades and she drops her head again, "That's why I'm so nervous about telling him. He never wanted this. He didn't want a relationship with me. A family was never part of his plan. I don't think he felt that he was up to the task. It's not like we planned this. It just kind of happened. I wasn't supposed to be able to get pregnant. I had been told I was barren."

Finally I am beginning to understand her pain. Her best friend in the world sleeps with her, once, and it never develops into anything more. He is taken and then, she finds out that she is carrying his child. She wants his return because he is her best friend but fears his reaction to her when she tells him her news. On top of that, she has to go through the pregnancy alone.

"Dana, I don't presume to know Agent Mulder, but I feel like I've gotten to know you pretty well over the last month or so. You are a smart, beautiful, and caring woman and I know that if Agent Mulder is one of your closest friends he must be a wonderful guy. It will be okay. Just tell him, you two will work it out."

I see tears forming in her eyes and reach across the table and take her hand in mine, "Dana, if there's anything I can do...."

"You've been a good friend. That's what I need right now."

"There's one more thing, I feel really bad about kissing a woman in your condition."

This has the effect I had hoped for and a smile spreads across her face, "I don't feel bad. Not at all."

It's my turn to smile at the amazing women sitting across from me. This wonderful moment is interrupted by an orderly telling us that Mulder is awake and asking for my partner. We follow him to the room, but she stops and I have to step to the side, to avoid running into her. "Dana, he needs you. You don't have to tell him about the baby right away, but you do need to be with him."

She nods and continues to walk into his room. I collapses into a chair and wonder how that bastard earned the love of that extraordinary woman.


"Mulder?" I hear and feel a soft hand brush the hair back off of my forehead. I try to respond and, when I don't, she continues running her fingers over my face, reassuring me that she is here.

Finally, I manage to get my eyes open and, this time, the view is much better. I see Scully's beautiful face, hovering above me. When she sees my eyes she smiles. She is so beautiful, when she smiles.

I try to move to touch her or talk to her but find I can't. I just let her gentle touch lull me back to sleep.


I don't look up, when I hear the staccato beat of her heels walking toward me. I have been too caught up in my own thoughts. Ever since I saw him, I've had this pit in my stomach. A pit that has grown larger and larger as I found out about the baby and realized just how in love with Mulder she was.

I'm trying to be happy for her. I am. I'm trying to be the supportive friend and partner she need, but I just keep thinking, 'Is that bastard good enough for her?'If he was, how could her sleep with her once and end it?How can you be lovers with someone as remarkable as her and then just go back to being friends?I know I never could and I sadly realized that despite what has happened between us, I never will.

She chooses the molded plastic seat next to mine and collapses into it. When I don't respond, she drops her head to my shoulder, reminding me of a puppy that wants to be petted. I wrap my arm around her and say, "How'd it go, partner?"

"Fine," she says with a yawn. "He's asleep."

"And that's exactly where you need to be."

"I'm fine," she says with another yawn.

"Dana, you can't just think about yourself. Your body is going through a lot every day. You need sleep to help regenerate. Sleep in a real bed, not a hospital cot."

Before I can finish her head is off my shoulder."Don't," she says. "Don't you dare treat me any differently just because you know. I need a partner and a friend, not a mother watching over me."

"I am your friend, Dana. I'm looking out for you," I say, refusing to back down.

She takes a deep breath, "Than please trust me to do what's right for me. Please John, I couldn't stand it if you treated me like I was less capable simply because of the baby."

We sit there, staring at each other. Finally, with a nod, I concede the staring contest but not her point."Did you tell him?" I ask, changing the subject.

She slumps back against the chair and says, "No," with a sigh. Then continues, "he was pretty much unresponsive, but I think he knows I was there."

She yawns again, and I look to see her head leaning against the wall, eyes closed. "Please, Dana," I try again. "My apartment is just a few blocks from here. I'll take you there, make you some dinner, then you can rest and I'll come back and stay with him." Her eyes fly open in protest. I hold my hand up and continue, "and before you say anything, I just want to make sure my partner is fully rested so she can cover my ass if need be."

She smiles and allows me to pull her out of the chair. I make sure the nurses have my apartment and cell number before we head home to find dinner and sleep.


This time the nothingness of unconsciousness is filled with a vivid dream, a vivid memory.....

"Come on, Scully!Admit it!You liked the movie a little!"

"It was a GUY movie, Mulder!" she whines taking another swig of her beer.

"You liked it," I insist as I hit the 'rewind' button and gather the empty popcorn bowl to take to the kitchen.

"Hmmmf," is Scully's noncommittal response.

"Scully, you laughed out loud. You don't laugh out loud, Scully," I say, presenting what I feel is a pretty good argument to prove my point.

I got a look usually reserved for instances of cow exanginations, eyebrow and all. "Oh really?" she says as she sets her beer on the coffee table and leans closer to me. "That's kind of like the pot calling the kettle black, isn't it Mulder?"

"I laugh," I insist.

"Of course you do," she says, her tone conveying the sarcasm in her statement.

"I do," I insist again. She leans closer and I start to get nervous. What could she possible be up to.

"I know," she says, with a nod of the head.

Jesus!She's going to kiss me. Why else would she keep leaning closer and closer. I am too stunned to move, so I just wait. She continues her slow lean in my direction. When I can feel her breath against my cheek, my eyes slide shut. Then it hits me, or rather she hits me. As I sit and wait for the gentle pressure of her silky lips, she does the last then I ever expect her to do. She starts tickling me.

I do laugh out load as I try to squirm out of her grasp. Unfortunately, she is in a superior position when she started so the best I can do is try to tickle her back. I begin my counter assault and hear roars of laughter erupt from my partner. We struggle for the advantage but she finally wins. I end up flat on my back on the floor between the coffee table and the couch, She ends up sitting across my belly, leaning forward, pinningmy arms above my head.

We remain in this position, smiling at each other and trying to steady our breathing. She has a huge smile on her face and from her position above me I can see a flush on her skin. I don't think I've ever seen a more beautiful sight in my life. Her smile disappears under my scrutiny and the expression that replaces it is one that I saw for the first time a few minutes ago. She's up to something again, planning her next attack.

I smile at this, pleased at myself for reading her so well and preparing for her next attack. Unfortunately, or fortunately as the case may be, she always keeps me guessing. Instead of tickling me she swoops down and seals her lips to mine.

It takes two kisses for me to respond. I begin messaging her lips with mine and attempt to move my arms so I can at least touch her, but she is unwilling to release me. Instead, she pulls her mouth from mine and begins peppering my face with kisses. I close my eyes and enjoy the feel of her lips as they kiss my nose, my eyelids, my temple, my cheek, the sensitive spot in front of my ear and even the mole on my cheek. As she does this, she slides her hands up my arms. When they reach my shoulders, she sits up.

She is leaning over me, her hands pinning my shoulders to the ground, her strong thighs wrapped around me, and her hair creating a halo around her flushed face as the light from the lamp behind her shines through it.

"God," I say. "You are so beautiful."

She gives a shy smile and says, "Looks like your wrong again, Mulder. Because as you can see, I do laugh, and I'm far from beautiful."

I shake my head, "No, I think you're the one's that's wrong again. Because, Scully, as you can see, I do laugh, and you are the most beautiful creature on earth."

This gets me both a smile and a laugh. It also gets me Scully, once again pressed against my chest, her lips covering mine. I expect the same chaste kisses that we shared earlier but instead she slides her hot, wet tongue between my teeth. I groan and try again to raise my arms to touch her but to no avail. She slides her hands down my arms, messaging and squeezing until she reaches my hands, where the interlocks our fingers.

Our kisses become more passionate as I message my tongue with hers. When I feel her start to grind her hips against me, I am hit by the sudden realization as to where this is leading. Pulling my mouth from hers is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do, but I do and manage to sit up with Scully straddling my lap.

She tries to kiss me again, but I stop her with a hand on either side of her face. "Scully, stop for a minute, please," I beg. She leans back and I release her face. "Scully, you don't know how many times I've dreamt about this, about having you in my arms, about making love to you, but I think we need to stop."

"Mulder..." she begins but I interrupt.

"I've never doubted that someday we would do this. I want this. I want you, when we finally do this I want it to be the beginning of my commitment to you. I want to be able to devote allmy strength and passion to you, to us. I don't think I can now. I think we are too close to finding the truth. I can't make a commitment to you right now. I can't treat you the way you deserve to be treated."

She watches my admission with a mix of confusion and admiration. As I finish, I can see tears forming in her eyes, "Come on, Scully," I say, trying to lighten the mood. "You don't cry."

She smiles through her tears and says, "Yes, I do. I think I've cried more in the last couple of years than I've laughed."

"Scully..." I begin, hurt by her admission.

She stops my words with a kiss. "The occasions when I've been the happiest have been when I'm with you. You've been there for the saddest times as well. I don't think you can have one without the other. How would you know which times were good, if there was never anything bad to compare it to?"

I bring my hand to her face and brush my thumb over her cheek, removing the tears that have yet to fall from her beautiful eyes. "I've imagined this too," she says. "I've imagined us together. I've imagined us making love and doing the things that lovers do. I've imagined us walking hand in hand down the street, holding hands at the movies, stealing kisses over a romantic dinner for two, reading the Sunday paper in bed, cooking dinner together, laughing, crying, loving, all the things that normal couples do. But, I've come to realize that's not us. That can never be us. That's not who we are. I don't think you will ever be able to live a normal life. I can't imaging you would ever give up the X-Files to settle down," she raises her eyes from my chest, where they have been for most of her confession to look into my eyes and continues. "I would never ask you to."

"Scully..." I try again but she isn't finished.

"Mulder, I want this. I want you. I want you so badly that I can't think straight. I'm not asking you for more than you can give. I'm not asking you for more than tonight. In our line of work, there may not be a tomorrow and if there wasn't I know that not being with you in this way would be one of my greatest regrets. I want to make love to you Fox Mulder."

I stare at her in disbelief. Once again, I am aware of the fact that Scully is the most amazing woman in the world and I am the luckiest bastard on the face of this earth, just to be allowed to be in her presence. I guess I am taking too long because Scully leans in again and captures my lips with hers. I immediately pull her against me and return the kiss.

After a few minutes she pulls away. "Okay?" she asks, short of breath from our kisses.

The most articulate thing I can think of to say is, "Yeah," with a big goofy smile on my face. She gets off my lap, takes my hand and pulls me into my bedroom. She pushes me onto the bed but I grab a hold of the waistband of her pants and pull her on top of me, "This is most definitely okay." She laughs and I smother the sound by pulling her mouth back to mine.

I remember ever contour of her body and the softness of her skin. I remember the way she felt pressed against me, clothed and naked. I remember the exact size, shape and weight of her breasts. I remember every scar and mark adorning her beautiful body. I remember every sound she made. I remember the exact look on her face when I tasted her for the first time, when I entered her for the first time, and when her body convulsed in pleasure. I remember the feel of her ragged breathing as she lay sated against me. I remember the way we smelled together. I remember the sighs and other sounds she made in her sleep. As I lay there next to her I knew I was the luckiest man on earth.


We didn't speak the entire way to my apartment. When we park, I find her asleep in the seat next to me."Dana," I whisper and run my finger down her cheek. She smiles and her eyes flutter open. When she turns and sees me her smile fades and I try not to take offense.

"We there?" she asks to cover whatever that was about. She slides out of the car and I stand just in time to see her stretching.

"Sorry it's so messy, I wasn't expecting guests," I say as I open the door.

"I'm sure I've seen worse," she says and flashes me a smile as she passes me.

"Make yourself at home and I'll get dinner started."

"John, you don't..." she begins to argue.

I ignore her and say, "Now I'm not much of a cook but I make a mean chicken fettucini."

She opens her mouth again to protest, but the look on my face is enough to stop her. "That sounds wonderful, John. Is there anything I can do to help?"

"You can take a load off and try not to fall asleep until after dinner."

Dinner is finished before she has a chance to fall asleep again. I find her laying on my couch flipping through channels. "Dinner's served," I say and she follows me into the dining room.

"It looks wonderful," she comments and sits. "Milk?" she says as she notices my beverage choice for us.

"I just figured..."

"No, it's wonderful. I'm sure I don't drink enough. Thanks for looking out for me," she says as she reaches across the table as gives my had a squeeze so I know that it's not just about the milk.

"Dig in, it's getting cold."

"It's wonderful," she says after her first bite.

I nod in thanks and we finish the rest of the meal in silence. When we are finished, I practically push her into my guest room. I retrieve a shirt for her to wear to sleep in and make it clear that I will not take no for an answer. Once she is changed and settled, I get my orders. Call her if anything changes. Call her if he wakes up. Do not, under any circumstances, mention that I am her new partner.

"And one more thing, John," she says. She leans from her spot propped against the headboard of the bed to my position sitting on the edge of the bed and kisses me on the cheek. "Thank you for everything."

I stand and say, "The keys to my car are on the table by the door. I'm gonna walk back to the hospital. I do not want to see your face before 9am, understood?"

She nods and I switch off the lights as I leave.


I wake again to the ringing of the telephone.

"There's been no change."

"I promised I would call if there was. It's only 8:30, why don't you get some more sleep and I'll call you if anything happens."

"I'm fine. I don't really need that much sleep."

"At least make some breakfast before you get here. I'm sure I have something. You need to eat more than just coffee."

"Yes, Dana, I'll stop mothering you."

I finally get my eyes open and see the man that was holding Scully standing in my room. Then I realize what he just said. Dana?He's talking to Scully. Scully is at his place.

"Agent Mulder?" he asks as I stare at him.

"Dana, he's awake." Then I hear the beep of him ending his call.

"Agent Mulder?Can you hear me?"

"Yes," I say.

"Good, that's good. Dana will be here soon. She will be very happy to see you."

"Who?" I manage but luckily this guys a smart one and figures it out.

"I'm sorry. John Doggett. I'm Dana's ....I'm a friend of Dana's."

A friend?It doesn't take me long to put the pieces together. This guy and Scully are together. He's allowed to hold her; she's at his apartment. They're together. She moved on; She found someone who will settle down with her. I leave and she finds her normal life. So much better than anything I could give, than anything I did give her. I slip back into unconciousness and return to the morning after we made love for the first time...

The next morning I am awakened with a kiss. She tells me she is heading home and that she will see in me the office. I fall back asleep. Finally, I make it into the shower and into work. When I get there, I find her sitting at my computer, a cup of Starbuck's in her hand and another on the desk. "Hey," she says with a smile that melts my heart.

"Thanks," I say as she hands my coffee. "Sorry, I'm late. I didn't get much sleep last night."

I think she almost laughs, "Your forgiven. Now, what's on the agenda for today?"

And with that, we are back to all business. There is no mention of that night. We don't touch each other again until she comes into my room that night in Oregon. I lead her to my bed and hold her until she falls asleep. I am soon to follow. When I wake, I am alone in my room.

The next time I touch her is when we hug in the hall outside of Skinner's office. I don't know if I can let her go. She is having a hard time as well. Deep down, I think we both know that this may be the last time we see each other.

At least if something happens, there would be no regrets, right?I almost start laughing as my list of regrets, when it comes to Scully, runs through my head. There are so many things I wish Scully and I would have done. I wish we could have walked hand in hand down the street, held hands at the movies, kissed over a romantic dinner for two, read the Sunday paper in bed, cooked dinner together, and laughed together everyday. I wish I could have held her when she cried. I wish we could have done all the things that normal couples do.

We only pull apart when Skinner clears his throat."The flight leaves in a couple of hours. I'll swing by your apartment in an hour or so to pick you up." Then he heads back into his office.

When he is out of sight, Scully grabs my hand and pulls me to the elevators. "If I can't go with you, the least I can do is help you pack."

It sounds reasonable to me and we both hop in our cars and head for my apartment. When I step into my apartment, Scully grabs me and pushes me against my door. Before that even registers, her lips are sealed over mine and her tongue is running over my lips, begging for entry.

I open my mouth to speak, but she slips her tongue inside and I am soon on the receiving end of the most passionate kiss anyone has ever received.

We only remove the necessary pieces of clothing, her shirt and hose, my pants. I spin her around and pin her against the door. She wraps her legs around me and buries her head in my shoulder, as we begin.

Afterwards, I fall to the floor in exhaustion and take Scully with me. When she leans back so I can see her face, it's covered in tears. At first, I think that I may have hurt her, but she smiles and kisses me gently on the lips. Then, she buries her head in my neck again and cries. I hold her and feel the tears forming in my eyes as well. I try to convince her that everything will be fine, that I will be fine but she's not convinced.

Eventually, she climbs off of me and heads to the bathroom to freshen up. I start packing and consider her reaction to me leaving. I don't know why we both feel like this is good-bye. I say a prayer that we are both wrong and vow to be extra careful.

When she emerges from the bathroom, I have to smile. Even with her clothes back on and her hair and makeup back in place, she still looks like she's just been fucked. She smells like it to.There's a knock on the door and she goes to answer it, while I clean up. Though I really would like to see Skinner's reaction when Scully answers my door looking like that....

"Mulder," I hear as I feel Scully's silky hands grab onto mine.

I open my eyes and see her standing before me. Her hair is wet and she's not wearing any makeup. She looks so beautiful to me. She smiles when she sees my eyes and sits on the edge of the bed. As she does, I notice that the man, Doggett, has his hand on her shoulder. I look from his hand and hope I give him mean glare.

I must be somewhat successful because Scully frowns and he says, "I'llbe outside if you need me."

Scully turns to him and says, "John, please stay."

He looks from her to me and I guess she wins because he grabs a chair and pulls it next to my bed, next to her.

"Scully," I says and she smiles.

"How do you feel?Do you need anything?" she asks gently.

"Fine," I say.

She runs her right hand over my arm as she holds my hand with her lefts. "Did you meet John?" she asks.

I nod.

"Mulder, do you remember where you were?"

I nod, yes, again and hope she doesn't want me to elaborate, the memories are still too painful.

"Do you know how long you've been gone?"

I shake my head and she says, "A little over three months." Three months!That's it!She's found someone new in three months.

"A lot has changed in those months. Are you up for an update or do you need to rest?"

I want to rest. I want to use sleep as a defense mechanism so I don't have to hear about her and this guy and how great and normal her life has become since I left. "I want to know," I say.

She looks at John. He nods in encouragement and begins, "John is.....John and I are...Mulder, after you were taken John became my...."

"Just say it Scully," I say.

"John is my new partner, Mulder. He's been assigned to the X-Files by Kersh. I'm sorry Mulder."

New partner?They're partners?I can't believe Scully got involved with another one of her partners. Especially, after only three months. I have to know.

"Is he the one, Scully?Is he giving you your normal life?"

She looks confused and then realizes what I'm talking about. "We're just partners, Mulder, and friends, good friends," she explains. I look and see a flash of disappointment cross his face.

"Oh," I say and she regards me for a minute, before she leans and kisses me on the forehead. She looks to Doggett and he looks like he is urging her to tell me something. She shakes her head and stands. She doesn't release my hand until her distance from me forces her to. I am asleep again before she's even out the door.


"Are you okay?" I ask as soon as she pulls the door closed behind her.

"Yeah, just tired."

"Why didn't you tell him?"

She sits in one of the chairs in the hall and considers her answer, "I don't know. I wanted to. I just...I just couldn't. I guess I'm still too scared of what is reaction will be."

"Listen, Scully," I say as I take a seat. "You really need to tell him. He deserves to know."

"Go home and get some sleep, John," she says as she rises to go back into Mulder's room.

"I will on one condition..." I say as I stand.

She raises and eyebrow and I continue, "that you tell him the next time he wakes up. He could use some good news."

She nods heads into Agent Mulder's room.


This time, when I wake up, my head feels much clearer.

I open my eyes and see Scully sitting in the chair next to my bed reviewing my chart, probably for the thousandth time.

"Good morning, Sunshine," I say and her eyes snap to mine.

She smiles. "It's not morning," she says teasingly."5:40pm. How are you feeling?"

"Good," I say. "Everything seems much clearer."

She nods and then looks back at my chart, "They've reduced some of the medications that have kept you sedated."

I nod and we sit in an uncomfortable silence.

"Scully, I'm sorry," I finally say.

"For what?" she says, confused.

"Well, for the assumptions I made about you and Agent Doggett and for the way I treated you before...."

"Mulder....?"

"All I could think about, while I was gone, was getting back to you so I could make things right between us. I've said it before, you deserve so much better than anything I could give..."

She shakes her head, no, and grabs my hand. I pull and she sits on the edge of my bed, next to my hip.

"I want to be with you Scully. I want us to work things out between us. Nothing is more important to me than you, and I want to prove that to you, if you'll let me."

She nods, yes, and I can see the tears in her eyes.

"Ah, Scully, did you forget, you don't cry."

She laughs at that and then bends over and brushes a kiss across my lips, "I'll be happy with whatever you can give, Mulder. I've told you that."

"Yes, but, I'll only be happy if I can give you the best. You deserve nothing less."

She smiles for a second and then the smile quickly fades and she regards me very seriously. "Mulder, there's something you need to know. What I have to say may change many things between us, but I need to tell you."

I have no clue what it could be and that worries me. I squeeze her hand and say, "Just say it, Scully."

"Do you remember right before you left?"

I give her a mischievous smile and I see a blush creeping up her checks. "Not that she says. "I was sick, remember?"

I nod, fearing what she's going to say. I told myself over and over that it was the flu. I didn't want to believe that it was anything else. I couldn't let myself believe that it was.

"I fainted again, after you and Skinner, left and the Gunmen took me to the emergency room. They ran a bunch of tests and found one anomaly."

"Cancer?" I ask, so afraid that she will say yes.

"No, Mulder, it's not the cancer. I'm still in remission. I'm...I'm pregnant."

She stares at me, trying to gauge my reaction. Pregnant?That was the last thing I was expecting her to say. "How?"

She smiles but, thankfully, doesn't give me the birds and the bees lecture, "The old-fashioned way I assume."

I nod. Wow. Scully's pregnant. Wow. That probably means. "It's mine?"

She smiles again and rests her hand on her abdomen. I examine the picture before me. Scully, sitting here next to me, her hair wild and wavy around her head, her blue eyes filled with joy, her hand resting over the baby growing inside her, our baby growing inside her.

"Wow," I finally say, my voice filled with the amazement I feel. I move my hand and places it over hers, where it rests on her stomach. She reverses their positions and covers my hand with hers, "You won't feel anything."

"Your so wrong, Scully," I say. "You can't possibly imagine all of the things I am feeling right now."

She smiles and nods.


I give them some time, before I head back into Agent Mulder's room. I picked a great time to leave my coat behind. After a while, I decide I could just sneak in and grab it.

I open the door and see Dana sitting on the bed, her hands covering Mulder's, where it rests on her stomach. I guess she told him. As I step inside, I see him reach up and brush away a tear from her cheek. They are both smiling like idiots so I assume it was a tear of joy.

Mulder notices my presence first. Dana follows his glare to me. "John," she says as she gets up off the bed. "I thought you were going home?"

"I'm sorry to interrupt," I say more to Agent Mulder than Dana. "I forgot my coat."

Dana hands me the coat and I say, "Is everything okay?"

"It's fine," she says with the biggest smile I have ever seen. "Everything's fine."

I nod, knowing it's true and head out of the room. As I close the door, I notice that Dana is, once again, sitting on the bed. The are both smiling and talking. I bite down the jealousy I feel and say a prayer for both of them and their child.

The End

Stay tuned for the next installment where Mulder proves to Scully that he can give her and their baby a normal life.

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