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Title: 13. Raining Cats and Dogs Summary: Spooky's story. The first good thing I smelled in my life other than my mother's milk was my Master. When I looked up with my puppy eyes newly opened, there he was. I thought for a moment that he was the other one; the one with the funny smelling hand. I liked him, too. He brought mother extra food and brought some for us too. Despite his care, one by one my littermates died. I was the biggest, the strongest. Maybe I made them die sooner, taking more than my share of milk. Poor weary mother shoved my brother and sisters away after she nuzzled each one to be sure they were dead. The sun broke behind my Master when he opened the kennel. I heard him gag at the terrible smell of the only home I had known in this world. It was even worse for me with my sensitive nose. I heard the kind keeper's voice, "Mulder, I think all those pups are dead." "That big one is still moving," Master said. Only I didn't know he was Master then. I just knew his hands were gentle as he wrapped my wet and feces smeared body in a clean towel. Grateful for the unaccustomed comfort, I kissed his nose, a large sharp muzzle although his teeth were very small. Humans are oddly put together. "Mulder, I think it's distemper," the rough voice of the kind keeper said. "You put him with the other puppies that are going to Karen." Master didn't listen. He wrapped me in the towel and he drove with me in his arms. I was very sick. I was so hungry yet the food and water ran through me. I was hot and cold all at once. Master brought me to a lady named Karen. Karen is kind but she gives you ouchs. I had a prick in my paw and a tube that carried water right into my body. I kept seeing my brothers and sisters tumbling over each other in the most beautiful place I had ever seen. They were shining and clean, happy, round, and playful as Golden Retriever puppies should be. They invited me to play instead of lying in the little cage. It was tempting, but whenever I thought about crossing the shining bridge that was lined with flowers, a hand held me back. It was my Master's hand. It was his voice that talked to me day and night. He told me about terrible human things, about troubles he had seen, but he also told me about love and happiness. He promised me that I would be his dog and that I would be safe. I would be loved. My heart knew him. Despite the terrible place in which I was born, I was a good dog. I knew that of all the wonderful things on earth, the most wonderful is to have a master. Each day I grew stronger until the food I ate stayed in my tummy. I was still weak when Master carried me home. He slept with me on his chest. He wasn't even mad when I had accidents right on him. I could smell other dogs, but I wasn't allowed to see them yet. They said I had distemper, but I don't know why they said that. I had a good disposition. I was a perfect Golden Retriever in that respect. However, my sickness had to be entirely gone before I could meet the other dogs. My world was full of sharp smells. The humans were careful to wash their hands with the stuff, but underneath, I could smell the goodness of them. My belly was full. I was warm and I was touched with such love. No wonder I chose to stay with Master and his beloveds. Soon enough, I met the other dogs. There was Pluto. Pluto is gruff and he puts his foot on your head when you bite his tail. He's kind though and has the most beautiful voice I have heard. He has lovely ears, too. When I was small, I loved to make a tent of his ear and go to sleep snug in the velvet of this living cave. He wouldn't move either until I was done with my puppy nap. Mars is a lot like Pluto. They're brothers, littermates. Sometimes I wonder about my brothers and sisters. Would we have been friends and partners the way Pluto and Mars are? I felt sorry for them, thinking they would never have a human to love until I dreamed about them one night. I went to play with them in my dreams and found they had human children to play with who had died as the victims of abuse. The puppies that died of abuse and neglect and the human children who died of the same heal together at the bridge. Belun is my best friend. He belongs to Alex. Well, so does Mars, but Belun is Alex's heart dog. He rescued him from the shelter and certain death. Belun always plays with me until we are both so tired that we curl up nose to rump and sleep for an hour or two. Belun is never grumpy like Pluto. Pluto is Walter's dog. Walter is my Master's alpha or, at least, most of the time, he is. Humans are strange and they take turns with being alpha, but Walter takes more turns than my Master and Belun's does. Walter has a growling voice. He uses it a lot with me. It's not my fault if I like to chew on slippers and shoes. They smell like my human people and they taste good. My brain tells me not to chew on them, but my teeth don't listen to them. The next thing I know is Walter's big gruff voice yells, "Mulder, your dog ate my shoe again." When Alex finds me, he sighs and takes the shoe away, giving me a dog chew toy to exercise my jaws instead. Later, I hear him say, "Mulder, Spooky is bored. He's from an intelligent breed. He needs work." My master always replies, "Spooky does have a job; he helps me write." I take my work seriously. I hate for my master to go in his office without me even if sometimes I feel as if I am going to explode if I have to try to be still another moment. Today, Master left early. I followed him anxiously to make sure he wasn't carrying the dreaded suitcase. The suitcase means he will be away for a day or more. I hate the suitcase and I've chewed up two of them in an attempt to make him stay home. It doesn't work. He makes growling human noises and stomps around then he buys another one or borrows one from his mates. Master's hands were empty so I settled down. My other masters were home, but occupied in cleaning the house. They have a cleaning lady come in, but they still feel the need to tidy up every couple of days. All four of us wanted to go outside. It was drizzling, but even a damp day was better than being inside during a human cleaning spree. I don't understand them. Just when the house smells good, they have to change everything. They stink up the place with sharp cleaning fluids and vacuum up all the dog hair that marked our favorite places. Once outside, Pluto and Mars sniffed around the yard. Mars caught a scent that interested him, but he is too well trained to follow a scent on his own. He stood, gently waving his ears and snuffling the interesting scent. He uttered a plaintive bark and looked back toward the house to see if Alex or Walter would response. The door remained closed so Mars plodded back to the porch, sighed, and dropped into a flop on the porch. Pluto followed him, resting his chin on his brother's back. Belun has been trained, but he thinks for himself a lot of the time. He sniffed quizzically and said, "It's a cat. Cats are fun to chase, but you are not allowed to chase them. That's a serious rule." A cat? I had met a cat at Mulder's pup's house. Mulder's pup is called William and I wish we could take him home with us. I have so much fun with him. Mulder takes his pup home with him every once in a while, but he always gives him back no matter how hard I try to stop him. The cat belongs to Missy, another human pup that lives in the same house. The cat is very large, fat, and lazy. It sits on top of its cat tree and seldom bothers to come down when I am there. Missy is a very determined human pup and she won't let me bother her cat. It's not that I would hurt Missy's cat. I would like to play with her even if she is very rude and spits at me. I wondered what a cat was doing in our territory. Even I know that cats aren't wild animals. They are supposed to live with humans. Very curious, I followed the scent. Belun walked to the edge of our fence with me then barked at me sternly to tell me that I had to stay inside. Our masters own a great deal of land, but unless they are with us, us dogs are only allowed in the area that is fenced. The scent of the cat seemed very near. I jumped up and down, trying to catch the curiously elusive odor. It seemed to be coming from the air. I knew better than to jump on the fence. If you do that, Alex and Walter come and correct you. That means stern words and, if you do it again, you have to go lie down until you are so bored that you want to howl. The fence has some kind of human magic so the masters always know when you have put your paws on it. As I jumped in the air, I thought for a moment that Walter-Master had caught me! I heard a big rumble and then there was a bright flash, but the sound was even bigger than Walter-Master can make. Right after that big sound, there was a crack and a tree branch fell on my side of the fence. The intriguing smell was suddenly under my nose. I followed my nose and saw a cat. It was not a big fat cat like Missy's cat, Pussnboots. It was tiny kitten, looking not much bigger than the mouse that Belun had caught in the grooming shed. The kitten had its multi colored fur sticking up in all directions. Its eyes were so big and green that I thought for a moment that it had misappropriated Alex's eyes. It hissed at me when I reached down to sniff it more thoroughly, but I ignored that. For some reason, I was reminded of my littermates. This kitten smelled as if it was sick or at least cold, hungry, and weak. The last time I had found something little and helpless, my master had not let me keep it. My master and his mates had taken the tiny human away and given her to master's littermate, Jeff and his pack. It was really unfair. I think I would like to have a pet. Why couldn't a pet have a pet? I would have preferred a small human, but this would do. I scooped the tiny cat up gently in my jaws. It panicked for a moment but went limp as it realized I was holding it gently. The grooming shed has a dog door we can use if masters are too busy to let us inside. The grooming shed is always warm, not as warm as the house, but much more comfortable for a cold cat than outside. I carried the cat in my jaws back to the main yard and through the dog door. Pluto and Mars plodded over and looked at my cat. Pluto sniffed it and it hissed at him. He backed away and shook his head. "Spooky, you will have to bring it in so the masters can help it." "No," I said. "It's my cat. I can take care of it. They give my pets away." Belun laughed and said, "Lighten up, guys. Let Spooky try. He found it. It's his." There was a certain agreement between Belun and the bloodhounds. They understood that Belun was an equal. He was much better at certain kinds of search and rescue than they were. They have the great noses, but Belun had verve and he could think outside the box. Still grumbling the way Master Walter does when his mates have outflanked him, Pluto walked away, followed by Mars, his ever-obedient shadow. Belun wagged his tail at me and said, "Can't wait to see how this works out." Left alone with my cat, I decided the first thing it needed was a bath. I tried to be gentle but my tongue was a lot bigger than a mama cat's. I bowled my cat over until I braced her with a paw. Even with an outsized tongue, it took a while before the cat was clean. It was still damp, but all the muck was off it. It explored a little, creeping near to the ground. It nosed anything that could be food. Duh, I had to get my cat some food. Mulder was usually the easy touch for a treat or even an early meal, but Alex was also inclined to give in. Once Alex had sat with me by the lake and told me that he knew how I felt when I was in the puppy mill. He said he had been abused, hungry, and friendless, too. I believed Alex. His voice had sounded so sad that I had to lick his sorrow away. I licked him so hard that I pushed him over and made him laugh again. Dogs have magic, too. I barked rang the bell to be let inside. The other dogs had already gone into the house and were lying in a heap of bloodhound red plus one mottled colored Belun in front of the fireplace. Walter sat snoozing in his favorite armchair, feet surrounded by my pack. I found Alex in the kitchen, which was perfect. Alex was drinking chocolate, a human treat that dogs are never allowed. I walked over and sat in front of him, one paw raised pathetically. Mulder had been trying to teach me that trick on the sly, but I hadn't felt the need to use it. He gives me everything anyway. Alex grinned and said, "You are a con artist, Spooky, but since you ask so nicely, I guess you can have a snack." I was allowed snacks because I didn't always thrive unlike Pluto and Mars. They had to watch their weight, or rather, Alex and Walter did. Belun could wear off his calories easily too, but he was too comfortable to bother getting out of the heap of his adopted brothers to cadge a few kibbles of food. I ate most of my snack, but managed to fill my mouth like the squirrels I loved to hate. I went to the kitchen door and sat there with my mouth stuffed. Alex laughed. Alex has the best laugh of all the humans. It sounds happy and free. I knew his life had been as bad as my days in the bad place of terrible smells, but he laughs often now. He said, "I guess you want to have a picnic? You really have the right name, Spooky! You're a very strange dog." Alex let me out. I trotted to the grooming shed and went in the doggie door. My little friend was asleep, but she woke up and scrambled up to a shelf when I came in the door. I dropped the food on the floor and nosed it, whining softly. My cat was smart. She was already learning to speak dog. She cautiously approached the food, nervous about me but obviously very hungry. She crept down and grabbed a mouthful of the kibble I had broken in my mouth. She didn't seem to mind that it was a little wet from my mouth. One Golden Retriever sized mouthful of food was a meal for my tiny kitten. She ate it all and her tiny tummy bulged when she was done. She rubbed against me and I licked her face clean. She made a soft growling sound, but I think it was a happy sound. My cat needed a name, but I had never had to think of one before. Humans took care of names usually, but I wasn't planning on sharing this kitten. The kitten moved closer and snuggled up to me, still making that interesting sound. I think I will name her after my mother. My mother's name was Zelda. She was one of the dogs that didn't make it. Only a pup herself, she also caught distemper. Weak from having a litter when she was less than a year old, she was not strong enough to survive. I remember her teaching us to play as soon as our eyes opened. She told us about her brief weeks in a human home before she chewed on a couch when she was left alone. Her owners had put a 'free to a good home with papers' ad. The puppy mill owners had snatched her up. I heard Alex say, when Mulder told him about Zelda, that it could have been worse. My mother could have been sold to a laboratory for painful experiments. Mother had a sad little life. I wondered what the family that had bought her from a pet store and kept her when she was little and cute would have said about her death. Would they have regretted the misery of her life? Karen, our vet, had tended my mother until her death. She had brought in volunteers so none of the suffering puppies and dogs brought to her had to die alone. I saw her petting my mother's head and whispering, "Zelda, Zelda, you are such a good girl." As weak as she was, my mother's tail thumped gently in her crate. When Karen crosses the Rainbow Bridge, my mother will be one of the dogs that crosses with her. If only for a night, my mother was Karen's dog. My father lived in the puppy mill, too. He was a handsome, strong fellow and was lucky enough to be healthy despite the conditions. He was adopted by one of Gina's clients and now competes in obedience, a fact that Alex and Walter pointed out repeatedly to my master. I expected to meet him one of these days. I think my other masters wanted Mulder to see my father, Fitz, in action in hopes of inspiring him to train me. I'm not opposed. Sometimes I get jealous when I see Pluto, Mars, and Belun load up for search and rescue. I love my master and I will play the pup as long as he needs me to be his wild child, but I have some good genes in me despite my puppy mill ancestors. I'm a Golden Retriever and service is in my blood. Maybe that's why I want my own pet. I'm still looking for my place in life. A snooze, though, was the only thing on my list right now. I turned on my back and let it all hang out. My newly named Zelda snuggled next to my neck and made her sweet sound in my ear. I'm going to keep her. A sweeter sound than the sound Zelda made woke me. My Master was calling me. I managed to remember not to leap up. My cat swatted at me for disturbing her. I guess cats are grumpy if you wake them up. She went over and searched for crumbs she missed. There weren't many. I was going to have to be a smart dog to keep her fed. I bounced up to my master, wiggling all over to greet him. Mulder smelled interesting. I could smell Miracle, William and Missy's bloodhound, on him as well as Missy's cat, Sass. I added my scent and my kisses to his face. He ruffled my fur and patted my head. When Alex came out, Mulder did the same thing to him. I guess Alex is Master's pet, too. I didn't know that before this, but like my Master, I'm always thinking. Mulder patted his thigh and I followed him into the house. Alex had put an arm around him as they walked. I don't really understand how my master has two mates or why his mates are both male like him. Then again, mates are something I will never understand. I was neutered before I even knew much about mates. I can smell interesting things at times when a female is in season, but I don't really miss the whole idea of mating. Humans mate all the time though. I like it better when master is not in the mood for mating. Sometimes all of us are allowed to sleep in the masters' room when they are done mating or if they are all too tired to play, but most of the time, it's late when they open the door. The house smelled really good when I came back from feeding my cat and taking a nap. Walter-Master was cooking chicken. Everyone likes fried chicken, especially us dogs. We only get a taste, but it was enough to rivet our attention any time our humans cooked it. I thought my kitten would really like some chicken. She needed to eat. I could feel her bones right under her skin. I had a feeling I was going to have to be a bad dog to get her chicken to eat. All of the masters went into the kitchen to finish preparing dinner. I heard them quarreling over whether to have mashed potatoes, which Walter-Master loves, or rice. Both Mulder and Alex-Master like rice. Personally, if I was human, I would rather eat more meat and skip the rest, but humans are very strange. Mulder and Alex won with the promise that tomorrow's dinner would have mashed potatoes. I don't really know what a tomorrow is, but humans are always either worried about it or looking forward to it. It must be something dogs can't have, like chocolate or onions. Pluto and Mars knew better than to hang around the kitchen when humans were cooking dinner. They waited in the living room like dog statues. Belun was watching a squirrel through the window, his body tense, wanting to be outside chasing it. I sat under the breakfast nook, looking for my chance. My masters sometimes ate dinner in the kitchen, but today they decided to set the big dining room table. Walter and Mulder tried to go through the doorway at the same time and spent a moment, laughing and kissing. When all three of my masters were in the dining room, I carefully selected a plump, juicy breast and hid it under the nook. No one noticed. Walter-Master always cooked more chicken than they could eat. Alex-Master loved cold fried chicken, a fact that often benefited the dog part of the pack. Alex usually shared a bite with each of us. We all had to execute perfect downs first, all of us at once, a row of wishful dog statues. I went over and tried the dog door in the kitchen. The masters mainly use that one when there has been a long period of dry weather. It was locked. I whined at the dog door until my master walked over and opened the door. I refused to go out and pawed at the dog door until my sometimes-dense master understood. "Ah, poor Spooky, you miss summer," Mulder told me. I wagged my tail, pleased that Mulder had mastered his trick even if he misunderstood my reasons. Putting down the dog towel, Mulder said, "Wipe your feet." All of us knew that trick. Walter and Alex made sure of that. I waited until Mulder returned to his dinner. Grabbing the chicken breast, I ran through the rain to the grooming shed. It was hard not to stop and gobble the delicious chicken, but I knew I had a responsibility to Zelda. Some instinct left over from a time when dogs cared for their own young instructed me and disciplined me. Zelda stared at me from her hiding place in a saddle Walter-Master had bought when he was determined to buy a horse. He changed his mind when he found out the gelding's owner was only selling it because her son's illness was draining her finances. A charitable donation from Project Iustum relieved the need to sell the gelding. Project Iustum was Master Alex's way to make up for bad things he did. I have no idea how gentle Master Alex could have done anything so terrible that he needed to spend the rest of his life making up for it, but he is sure that he did. I have to admit that I was not quickly potty trained. It took a long while for my bladder to mature after I recovered from distemper. I also had that shoe habit. Still, I didn't feel guilty about my past. I don't know why Master Alex did. All of my Masters were perfect, the best in the world. I gently shredded the chicken off the bone. The wonderful smell brought Zelda down. She uttered plaintive cries as she approached. A moment later, she had a large piece of chicken in the corner and growled in a way to make me proud of her fierce spirit. I made a pile of pieces and then ate the rest of the evidence. Master Mulder always said chicken bones were bad for dogs, but I couldn't help eating them. They tasted good and I had to get rid of the evidence. Zelda could eat a lot for such a small creature, but she couldn't finish the chicken. I ate what she left. Zelda sat between my paws making her soft grumbling sound and trying to clean the grease from her face. I helped her, leaving her with a spiky hairstyle that resembled my master's hair when he just got out of bed. Zelda went back up into the saddle to sleep and I reported back to the house just in time for the chicken treat from my master. I wagged my tail even when Belun snorted as he smelled the chicken already on my breath. I could see feeding Zelda was going to be the hard part. Who knew that kittens could eat so much? After our taste of human food, Alex fed us. The humans had a ritual, preparing our four bowls of food. Again, we had to wait in a down. When I was a puppy, this was so difficult to do. The memory of my constant hunger at the puppy mill made me think I was starving. I didn't have to wait long, but it seemed like an eternity when I was little. Now, I knew there would always be food, petting, and a dry and warm place to sleep. I still loved dinner time though, the feel of my belly replete with the good food. It was hard to remember to save a jaw full of food for Zelda, but I did. She mewed at me when I delivered it, wanting more chicken. She batted at the kibble with her paw, ate one morsel, and then groomed herself. I suppose she would eat it later. She tried to groom me too, trying to pull my head down with one tiny paw. She was a funny thing and I knew that even Master could not take her from me. Master called and I nudged Zelda towards her hiding place. She swatted at me then stalked off with her fluffy tail held high. She has spunk. I dived out the dog door and ran to circle my master. He laughed and said, "I was starting to wonder if you were sick, Spooky, with all the time you are spending lying down. At least, I guess you must be going to lie down when you go in the grooming shed. Maybe I better have a look." This was not good. My Master was a trained investigator. His mates always said so. My tail hung between my legs as I followed Mulder into the grooming shed. He looked around, but didn't look inside the saddle where Zelda hid. "Smells odd in here," Mulder said. "Hope it's not rats again. I might have Alex ask Matilda to bring Chance over. He will root out any rodent ... except my rat, of course." I don't know why my master called Master Alex 'his rat'. Other than the pet rat owned by Tommy, one of Master's nephews, he doesn't seem fond of rats. Master Alex doesn't resemble a rat very much either...unless he drinks too much and sticks out his large front teeth. He doesn't do that often because Master Walter always takes his picture when Master Alex is drunk. Chance, of course, is Matilda's Pit Bull. He is a big white dog with a patch over his eye and scars on his body. Chance is happy now, but he has sad memories, sadder even than my own of my life in a puppy mill. Chance has a lot of what is called prey drive. I sniffed, but there was no rat smell in the shed. I think my kitten needed to learn to do her business outside. It's a lot of work owning a pet. I suppose I was even more trouble when I was a puppy although I have reasonably good manners now as long as no one leaves a nice juicy shoe around to tempt me. If they do, it's their own fault. Mulder told his mates that I was going through a spooky phase and they should allow me to go in and out the kitchen door as I pleased. That made it a lot easier to bring food to Zelda. Belun helped me feed her. With his mouthfuls of food added to mine, she had plenty to eat. Belun even helped me steal human food for Zelda. He explained to me that life is full of situational morals. He said that his master would agree with that. Belun said Zelda needed to eat and she needed meat. Cats need more meat than dogs do. At least, Zelda always seemed hungry unless she had some chicken or fish or good lean beef. I had a feeling that this was not how a good dog thinks even if Belun is a good dog. Zelda didn't care for Belun at first, but after he fed her a few times, she was okay with him. Pluto and Mars didn't think much of what Belun and I were doing. That's the problem with them. They only saw life one way, having come from a long line of law enforcement dogs. "Follow your nose and never lose the scent," Pluto always said, as if that was all life's wisdom. Belun and I may not have a bunch of letters after our names, but we are clever in our own ways. All went well with Zelda for a long time. I'm not good at telling time, but it was long enough for her to grow fat and much bigger. She seemed happy although perhaps she would be happier if she was allowed inside on the couch like Missy's cat, Pussnboots. I wasn't sure how I could talk my master into adopting Zelda. Master Walter can be quite firm about such things. He said they already had more pets than people and four dogs were quite enough. Zelda was getting too big to hide in the saddle. She managed to keep out of sight and I taught her to go outside to meet her needs as soon as she was big enough to push through the dog door. The shed was warm enough and there were things for her to play with. Master Alex left a bottle cap when he was grooming Belun one afternoon. Zelda loved her cap, batting it everywhere with her snowy white paw. I thought she was a very clever cat, although I don't know many cats. However, compared to Pussnboots, she seemed very active and very smart about staying out of my masters' sight. Zelda and I learned to communicate after a while. She never learned to bark and I never learned to meow, but we understood each other anyway. She was interested in my people. She remembers being born in a house. She said her mother gave birth to her and to two other kittens in a dark closet. Her mother tried to keep them hidden, but eventually her human found the litter of kittens. The human male had yelled, but the children cried and he relented, allowing the kittens to stay until they were weaned from their mother's milk. Two of her siblings were found homes, but Zelda wasn't chosen despite her pretty appearance. She had been sickly when the people examined her siblings and her so they picked the other kittens. A few nights later, the human male, a man who Zelda said smelled very horrible, put her in a bag, and threw her off the bridge. She was lucky enough not to hit the water. How a tiny kitten managed to travel through the woods is a marvel, but Zelda is a very wonderful kitten you see. I think we both had terrible starts. The only difference is that a human rescued me. I wanted Zelda to know that there were good people, people like my masters, but I was afraid they would take her from me. I really wanted to keep her. When her tiny paw patted my ear or tapped my face, I loved her as much as I loved my Master and he's the world to me. Zelda played with me all of the time. I would sprawl on my side, letting her wrestle with my face, bat at my whiskers, and pounce on my ears. Her sharp claws and teeth sometimes pricked me, but I was always gentle with her. Belun played with her too, but he would get up and go away when she used her teeth and her claws. My cat wasn't tiny anymore. The masters cleaned the grooming shed once or twice a week. So far I had hid Zelda outside when they were working in the shed. She didn't like it much since it was raining a lot, but she understood. After the masters finished, Zelda always sniffed at their scent in her home. When I went inside, I went to my master, put my paw on his knee. Mulder looked at me, trying to understand. He patted me and asked, "What's the problem? Do you want a walk?" I always wanted a walk with my master. I turned around three times in a circle in joy as he got my leash. All the other dogs wanted to go too so Alex-Master grumbled and put on his coat. I think Alex-Master might be part cat. He doesn't like rain very much. We had a wonderful walk, full of interesting smells and sights. Belun found something wonderfully smelly to roll in and wouldn't share it at all. That meant trouble. When we found some great natural dog perfume, our humans always took us to the grooming shed to get rid of it. Oh oh... Zelda was out doing her business. Cats have good timing sometimes. Alex commanded poor Belun into the walk in tub. Belun walked to the tub, obedient, but a very unhappy dog. Alex snorted as he watched his dog approach. "If they ever audition for a part in a movie for a dog walking to the electric chair, you're elected." My master put me up on the grooming bench. He didn't have to use the leash. I like being brushed although I'd prefer to lie down rather than stand. The bench is comfortable and I know Mulder likes it because he can brush me without straining his back. When he was done, my master hugged me, his forehead resting against mine. I gave him a kiss. Mulder was a wonderful master. I was a lucky dog. Maybe I should tell him about Zelda. Mulder swept the floor. He squatted and picked up a fluff of fur. "Hey, this looks like cat fur." "You should brush Spooky more often," Alex said. "He probably still had cat fur from the last time you visited Scully. Pussnboots sheds everywhere." That earned Alex a swat with my hairbrush. It's funny. Our humans never hit us, but they are always slapping each other on the butt. I have a feeling that it's part of human mating rituals. Humans are very weird. Belun chose that moment to shake, splattering us all with wet drops smelling of his fur. Belun smells good to me, but humans aren't crazy about the scent of damp dog. Alex said, "Belun...did you have to do that?" Alex groaned and dried Belun, grumbling the entire time. Master made me come in so I didn't have time to check on Zelda. She probably wasn't crazy about her home smelling of wet dog either. It was still raining. I thought that was why Zelda didn't want to play and why she didn't have much of an appetite. I didn't want to think why she didn't feel like grooming herself. Were it not for my efforts, her pretty white paws, her big orange patch on her head, and her lovely patched fur would all have been soiled. She had gooey stuff in her eyes no matter how much I washed her face. Finally, I could not block the smell and the taste of sickness from my senses. My kitty was ill. When I went out and found she had an accident and couldn't even crawl away from it, I knew I had to ask Master's help even if he took my Zelda away. The heart of a dog knows wrong from right and letting my cat die because I wanted to keep her was not a right thing. I went to my master, pawed his arm, and barked. Mulder looked at me, pushing his glasses up from his face and asked, "What's wrong, Spooky?" I barked again and did the unthinkable, grabbing my master by his sweater clad arm and tugging. Master showed how smart he was for a human by saying, "Alex, something's wrong. Spooky wants me to go with me." "Probably found a dead squirrel after all this wind and rain," Master Alex said, but he put on his boots and jacket anyway. I looked back to make sure they were following and led them to the grooming shed. "He wants a bath?" Master Alex remarked. "First dog I ever have met that drags you to groom or bathe him." "He wants something," Mulder said, sounding a lot more serious than Master Alex. "Wait a minute," Master Alex said, unlocking the gun cabinet. He took out a holster and put it on. "Alex," Master said. "Spooky might be telling us about something we better not face unarmed," Master Alex said. Master Mulder nodded and he also took his gun. I sure hope they won't shoot Zelda. I wish humans could learn to speak better dog. I would have barked fiercely if it was something dangerous. Mulder opened the door to the grooming shed and said, "Alex, I don't think we need our guns. It's a cat. A kitten." Squatting, Alex took a look at Zelda. He said, "She's ill." "Where did she come from?" Mulder asked. "I have a feeling she's been here for awhile." Lying down, I licked Zelda and try to reassure her that my masters were kind and good. She meowed miserably. "Spooky, leave it," Mulder shouted. "Whatever she has might be catching." I disobeyed, not for the first time in my life, but never for a better reason. I stood over Zelda and I growled. "It's Spooky's cat," my Master said. "Do you remember how sulky he acted when we gave Kitten to my brother? Spooky seemed to think since he found her that he should be able to keep her." "Sounds as if you are anthromorphizing," Alex said. "So what's your explanation?" Mulder asked. Master Alex shrugged and said, "I'll get a box and let Karen know we were coming." Master Mulder said to me, "It's okay, Spooky, we'll help her. Poor little thing." Master Walter scares me just a little. It's his growling voice and he is so sure he is right. Sometimes when Master Walter is arguing his point, my master, my wonderful Mulder-Master, yells. Master Alex goes quiet. He gathers the dogs together and he watches with us. The good thing is when Master Alex finally speaks, usually Master Walter and Master Mulder stop yelling. I think they still worry about Master Alex. I think Master Alex was a puppy mill human or something like that. He has a past that hurts him and his mates don't like to cause him more pain. Right now, I wanted to bark at Master Walter who doesn't even want my cat in the house. He thinks she will give us a disease. Alex and Mulder turned stubborn faces to him. Alex scowled and said, "It needs help. Have as much compassion as Mulder's dog, Walter." Walter looked embarrassed. He said, "I'll bring the car around to the front." I wasn't going to be left behind. I remembered when my master's voice was the only thing that kept me from joining my mother and siblings at the Rainbow Bridge. I was Zelda's master. I had to stay with her so she knew that she had good days in front of her. My master kept reaching his hands in the box to pet Zelda. I heard her make her happy sound for him. Maybe I was wrong. I should have shared her with my master from the first. Karen is pretty nice even if she is fond of sticking things in my butt and giving me shots. She was one of the first good humans I knew other than my master, Mulder, and Master Alex. My first memories of being clean were in her clinic. You might think dogs don't care about being clean. After all, we don't mind playing in the mud and we roll in smelly things. We don't like not being able to get away from our own shit though and we like clean water to drink. When I was a pup, the entire world smelled foul. My poor mother talked wistfully about a place called a yard, where you could play on clean grass. She said even more wonderful was the human house, where you might be allowed to lie on a couch or even sleep with a human on a bed. She hoped all of us pups would have such a home when we grew up. I guess I have to have a home for my entire litter since my two sisters and my brother went to the Rainbow Bridge with mother. It is a great home and I have the most wonderful master in the world. Anyway, when I was well enough to appreciate things, I loved having clean fur and a nice mat on which to sleep. Despite the way food ran through me, Karen and Mulder kept me clean. Every sick dog had a volunteer to pet them and try to persuade them to stay on earth. The room had been full of soft voices, promising better days to my fellow sufferers. Although I was very sick, surely sicker than Zelda, I survived. I think my master can save Zelda too. "Is it infectious to dogs?" Walter-Master asked. "Not at all," Karen said softly. "There's no risk to humans either, only to other cats." My master asked, "Would Missy's cat, Pussnboots, be at risk if we kept the kitten at our house?" "No," Karen said. "The disease is spread by bites, cats grooming each other or sharing food and water and litter boxes." "So can you find the cat a home?" Walter asked. I barked loudly at that. Zelda was much better and she was ready to come home with me. I just had to get that idea across to my dense human masters. My Master proved how brilliant he was by saying, "The kitten is going home with us. She's Spooky's cat." Alex walked in with Zelda purring in the cradle of his not-arm. Master Alex must have been in a terrible accident as he has only one flesh and blood arm. He has another arm that he uses effectively, but which is made of plastic. You must not chew on Alex's arm. That is a very important rule I violated just once as a puppy. Even Belun was disgusted with me about that mistake. Master Alex said nothing, as is his way. He's always listening and thinking unlike my master who barks nearly as much as I do and sometimes for as little cause. Karen sighed and said, "With as many healthy kittens and cats needing homes? I could call Maggie and Linda to see if they have an opening, but I generally know when they have lost a cat. They specialize in hospice care for dying cats, but the amazing thing is that once they take a dying cat, it seems to gain a new hold on life." "Is the kitten dying?" Alex asked quietly. "She seems well now." "No, she's fine really," Karen said, "Unfortunately, she may be a carrier for FeLV so she should not live where she will be in contact with other cats." "Is she suffering?" Alex asked. "No, she's not suffering," Karen said. "It's unusual for a kitten to survive the onset of the illness, but she's fine now, no symptoms. She may be immune and we can retest her in a few weeks to see if she harbors the disease or not." "Can't keep calling her 'she'," Alex remarked, stroking my cat again. My master looked at me and then to my kitten. He smiled and said, "Spooky's mother's name was Zelda. It was in her paperwork from the puppy mill." "I remember," Alex said. "You wrote her previous owners a note to let them know how she died. We sent pictures of the puppy mill so they knew where Zelda came from before they bought her in the pet store and so they knew what kind of hell they gave her to when they were too lazy to train her. Free to a good home." I would have been afraid at the way Master Alex's voice sounded if I thought it was about me, but I knew it wasn't. He sounded like that when he talked about bad people and lazy, ignorant people who carelessly hurt animals. "I think we should call her 'Zelda' since she's Spooky's cat," my master said. I told you he was a very intelligent human. "Do I suddenly not have a vote in this family?" Walter-Master growled. Both of my other masters looked like I did when I had an occasional accident inside the house. "No, of course not," Mulder said. "It's up to you," Master Alex said, ducking his head and avoiding Walter's eyes as I did when I wasn't sure if I had did something wrong. Master Walter pushed at his glasses as he does sometimes when he is nervous or thinking hard. He finally said, "I'll make a deal with you, Mulder." My master's expression went blank. He asked, "What kind of deal?" "You put Spooky in some kind of training or activity and I'll put up with the cat." My master looked at me and I thumped my tail to encourage him. Training and activity were words I knew from Belun, Pluto, and Mars. They enjoyed going to all the things that their masters did with them. I was jealous sometimes even though good dogs shouldn't feel that way. Master nodded and said, "Okay." I wagged my tail furiously and went to check on Zelda. She seemed very content in Master Alex's arm and batted at my nose when I stretched up to sniff her. Zelda isn't a very loyal cat. I like training. Master signed me up for basic obedience at Gina's dog training center. I knew most of what I was supposed to learn already, but the difference is that Master no longer leaves it up to me whether I sit or go into a down. When he tells me to something, he means it now. It's a relief. I was not sure if Master knew he was the master before this. A dog wants a master. When we get home, Master always brags about how well I did. He is talking about entering me into obedience competition and seeing how I did against my father. Pretty cool! Zelda is on the couch. She blinks at me as if telling me she is well aware that I am not allowed on the couch without a specific invitation by my masters. Master Walter is sprawled over most of the couch, one hand holding a book and the other petting Madame Zelda. He stopped when Mulder entered and looked embarrassed. Zelda is officially 'Spooky's cat' and only here because of the bargain between Walter and Mulder. "Caught you," Mulder said, with a grin. "She was lonely without Spooky," Walter said. "I was just being nice." Which is why most mornings Madame Zelda sits on Walter's lap as he reads the paper, swatting at the pages as he turns them. I found a sunny patch of floor and lay down to take a nap. Zelda came over, softly curled in the curve of my neck, and kneaded my ear before snuggling into it as if it was her blanket. I listened to her happy sound, which I now know is called a purr. I wished I knew how to purr because I was as happy as a dog can be. Before I could fall asleep, the sun ducked behind a cloud and it started to rain again. My master said, "Walter, it's raining cats and dogs again." Master Walter growled, "And I suppose we have to adopt them all?" Master just laughed. I checked and the rain was definitely plain water, not cats and dogs. Sometimes humans are so peculiar and you just have to humor them. I wondered if that was where Zelda came from. Did she rain from the sky? It doesn't matter. She's my cat now. The end of my tail. Thump. Thump. Thump.
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