Title: Inebriation Series 4: Cuervo Gold
Author: Barenaked Bostonian
Written: October 2001
Disclaimer: Am I Chris Carter, shall we dwell on this or would you rather just read my dear? Yes, that's what I thought!
Distribution: Okie! Ya know I love it, tell me where so I can brag!
Rating: NC-17 Bayyyybeeee!!!!

Summary: Mulder and Scully go to a Halloween party? With the Gunmen? Yes and yes, but it's believeable! With tequila, now we're getting somewhere!

Note: It's been awhile but I have started on the fifth in the series, which is smutty yes, but it is very loving and gentle and :::sniffle::: just plain good. okay, it's sex, what can I say?


Mulder stared at her for a moment before her idea sunk in. He quirked an eyebrow wondering where the hell she had come up with an idea so... out there.

"You know Scully, you do sort of look like Jodie Foster..." Mulder speculated.

"Oh I do, do I? Well then, all the more reason to go like that."

"I dunno Scully, I don't exactly fit the description of Dr. Hannibal Lecter. How would I dress?" He felt somewhat defeated, mostly because the costume idea had never really been done before. "Aw, Mulder," she said, a slight chuckle in her voice as she tried not to laugh at his withered and defeated look. "Don't worry, I'll find something."

"Alright, but no ducking out of this party. I already tried but last year's excuse of I have to go out on a case won't exactly work. The guys have been monitoring the office for us, damnit!"

"Mulder... I can't believe that I'm the one saying this but, it won't be that bad."

"I hope not, last year I heard something about a goat and a bomb, I really didn't ask anything beyond that."

"Sounds intruiging," Scully said flatly as she got up to straighten out her clothes. "At least MY costumes will be easy." She looked over her shoulder and gave him a wink.

Mulder's heart leapt into his throat. "Did she just wink at me?" he thought, "Because that definately was NOT a blink." He had never seen Scully actually wink before, or show any signs of post oral come-hitherness. That was probably because he had never put his... oral skill to work on her. He smiled smugly and went in the kitchen to refill his glass.

Scully came padding back out of her bedroom moments later, adorned in her dark crimson slik nightware. Mulder chuckled at the way the pants were just a bit too long and dragged on the floor behind her. His eyes traveled up her body and he realized how innocent she looked. She had never looked quite like this before so he ingrained the image on his memory. She looked so cute, her hair mussed and her eyes sleepy. She took a seat at the kitchen table across from him.

"So we need to work a couple things out, don't we?" she asked him, suddenly getting up and going to her cupboards for a mug. She filled the kettle, put it on the stove and sat back down.

"Meaning what?" Mulder asked. There were several things they needed to discuss, he just didn't know what she was referring to. "Our costumes, we don't have much time, so we'd better get to thinking."

"Scully, you mean you're actually *giving* a rat's ass about all of this?" He chuckled and titled his head to the side. This *had not* been the reaction that he had been expecting to come from her.

"Well, Mulder, it's been awhile since I did much of anything on Halloween, much less go as a couple, and I'd like to look... different."

"Ah, I see. You just want to show everyone up, don't you?"

"Exactly, now, I can go in my regular wear-" She was cut off abruptly by Mulder putting his hand up. "You know that dress that Clarice wore in Hannibal? The black one at the end?" She nodded. "I think you should wear that."

"Ah, Mulder, that dress is a little... revealing, for me." She attempted a smile but couldn't even pull off a half-assed one. "Well then Scully, we'll have to try some *other* costume idea."

"Oh, fine fine fine." She huffed and got up to make her tea. "Now about you..."

"What about me? Can you make me a cup too?" She pulled down another mug and put a tea bag in it. She waited until they both had adjusted their tea before she began to speak again. "What will you be adorned in Mulder?" Her eyes were peeking out over the rim of her mug, and Mulder could barely see her eyes behind the steam rising from it. "Well... what did he wear that would make me *look* like him, so people wouldn't have to guess?"

"Well, let's think a moment here." She put down her mug and began to ponder.

"Ah, you could wear the suit he did in Silence of the Lambs, the one when he was in prison, and then we could get you that God-awful mouthpiece he wore in the sequel, unless you object to wearing that."

"No, no, that's good. In fact, I think I know where I can find one of those."

"And where would that be Mulder?"

"In a cataloge I saw. It had movie memrobilia and things like that. I think they ship overnight, so I would definately have it by Friday." Mulder felt proud, on one hand, he now had an awesome costume idea, on the other hand, he was going out in public, to a party, with Scully. This was too good to be true.


Friday, October 29th
Scully's Apartment

Mulder didn't bother knocking anymore, he just used his key. She didn't seem to mind the last few times he had done this, so he took his life in his hands and attempted it again.

When he stepped into her apartment, he was greeted only by darkness. He wandered around until he found her in the bathroom, appling the finishing touches to her makeup.

"Hey there, G woman," he said quietly, and leaned against the doorframe. "Oh, gosh, Mulder. I didn't see you there!" She said after she had jumped nearly a foot off of the floor. "Sorry."

"It's okay, give me a minute, I'm almost ready."

As she spun around to go into her bedroom, he noticed her hair seemed longer.

"Are those extensions?" he asked, awed at how well they blended with her own hair color. If he didn't know her he would have thought they were real.

"Yeah, I did them myself, do they look okay?"

"It looks like you got a bottle of hair growth tonic, it looks like your own."

"Ah, good then."

She had made her freckles more pronounced on her nose and cheeks. He was stunned with Scully's ability to make herself look exactly like someone else.

She walked out of her bedroom, an ID in hand. He snatched it from her.

"Clarice Starling, FBI..." he read the writing on it. "Yeah, I just printted out the picture from the internet and used the bureau's 'resources' to put the finishing touches on, does it look okay?" She was nervouse, because she wanted to look good, but also because she wanted to secretly impress him.

She looked... yummy in that dress, although it wasn't as low cut as Starling's was in the movie.

"Scully, you are amazing," he said and kissed her forehead. "Thank you Mulder, I love your outfit."

"Yeah, I snatched it from evidence."

"Mulder-"

"Don't worry Scully, the case had been closed for thirteen years, I doubt anyone is going to claim it."

"Well...." She let it slide. "Where's the mask?"

He walked into her living room and she followed him, trailing behind. When he got to the sofa he took the mask out of the bag and held it up.

"Nice." She commented as she took it out of his hands and examined it. "Very nice."

"Well, if you're ready-"

"Let's go... and no eating my brain!"

"No, Hannibal loved Clarice."

"Well, whatever."


Foster's Warehouse and CO
Downtown Baltimore

Mulder and Scully drove up to the warehouse entrance, it seemed deserted, no one was around. Scully began to think that the Gunmen had set them up when a dark figure popped out of the bushes.

"Identify yourself." It whispered.

"Langly, shove it up your ass," he said dryly, looking past him. "Mulder! You came this year... and you brought Agent Scully. Hey."

"Hello Langly," she said to the pale vampire who was now leaning on Mulder's window. "Everyone's inside, there's a lot of people here, more than last year."

"How many?" Mulder asked curiously. "Maybe 200, 250? There's more coming and it's early. You guys can park in the back and go in."

"Thanks Langly."

"No, thank you." He retreated back into the bushes.

Mulder chuckled as he manuvered the car around the back of the warehouse. Once accomplished, he went around to the passenger side and helped Scully out of the car. Wearing the black dress, she found it difficult to manuever herself out of the car.

They walked to the front of the warehouse and was stopped again by a man in a ninja suit.

"Mulder?" he asked. "And Agent Scully?"

It was Frohike, about to threaten to release his killer kung fu before he realised who it was that was about to enter.

"You came this year, and you brought this scrumptious morsel with you." He eyed Scully and her dress, apprieciatively.

"Don't even think about Frohike, you may have killer kung fu, but I have a gun."

Frohike chuckled. "Enjoy yourselves."

Mulder grabbed Scully's hand and she looked up at him with a strange twinkle in her eye, one that he had never seen before from her. It excited him to no end.

They pulled open the heavy iron door and were hit with a blast of music and warm, dry air. They stepped into the condemned warehouse and were surprised to see it nicely renovated. The warehouse looked delapidated from the ouside, but on the inside, it resembled a modern dance club. Both agents wondered where the Gunmen had gotten the money to fix this place up. Or rather, where they had 'borrowed' it from.

The two just stood there for long moments taking everything in, the lights, the people.

Scully was startled when she felt a hand tap her shoulder. She spun around quickly, to find Byers standing behind her.

"Hello Agent Scully, Mulder. I'm surprised to see you here. Nice costumes, Hannibal and Clarice, haven't seen that one done yet!"

A look of pride broke across Scully's face.

"Well, thank you. I'm surprised to see you too, Byers. Why *are* you here?" Mulder asked, smiling. "Felt it was my duty to do the whole 'don't drink and drive' thing when people leave, you know." Byers, shoved his hands in his pockets.

"Byers, if you don't mind me asking," Mulder started, "Where did you guys get the money to fix this place up?"

Mulder looked at Byers' costume. He was dressed as a secret service agent. Mulder chuckled and shook his head.

Byers looked at them both for a moment, smiling. "It wasn't our idea to go this... all-out, it was our associate Jimmy's idea. I guess you could say he's, well, loaded." Byers' smile grew larger and he coughed in order to contain it before it spread any more.

"Well, whoever did it did a very good job," he said, nodding appreciatively. "To tell you the truth Agent Scully, we did it ourselves, we bought everything and configured it to our liking. We don't own this place or have papers for it, so we had to keep it on the hush-hush." Byers began to smile again, but instead of containing it, he turned it into a laugh. "Frohike and Langly did most of the dirty work, while I made excuses to get out of it."

Scully laughed. "I see."

"Well, you two have a good night, I'm on patrol for police." Byers walked away into the crowd. "I didn't know the Gunmen had this many friends," she said.

"It's probably more like, friends of friends of friends," Mulder replied, steering them toward the refreshments.

Once there, he picked up two shot glasses that were being filled by a tall blonde man.

"Hello Agent Mulder and Agent..."

"Scully," he said suspiciously as he raised the shot glass to his lips. "Ah, right, sorry. I'm a bit forgetful. I'm Jimmy."

The man stuck out his hand to shake Mulder's and in the process knocked over three glasses. "Oh well," he said as he shook the agent's hands. "Enjoy." He said as he shoved a piece of lime into Mulder's hand.

It was then that Mulder realized he was about to down a shot of tequila. He looked from the liquid to the lime and then back to the liquid. He downed it one gulp and then sucked on the lime.

"There are tables over there if you guys want to sit." He pointed to the left, where there were a line of table lined up against the wall, hidden by darkness.

"Thanks," Mulder replied and led Scully over to one of the tables. She sat down across from him.

"I'm really impressed Mulder. I thought that we'd be at a condemned shithole, but they really pulled this one together."

"Indeed they did." Mulder moved his chair over closer to Scully.

He eyed his shot glass and then he eyed her. He didn't know if she's let him get away with what he was about to do, in public no less, but he was going to attempt it. He leaned over, shot glass in hand and licked Scully, from where her cleavage began to the point just behind her ear. She gasped.

"Mulder... what do you think you're doing?" She rasped out.

He raised his eyes so he was level with her and took one of the many pieces of lime and put it between her teeth. He pulled off his 'mouthguard' and set it on the table, next to the glasses, of which there were six.

"Just hold it there Scully, don't do anything until I say." She nodded. He downed the shot and when he came up for air, he pressed his lips to hers and began sucky on the lime. Scully let out a strangled moan and released the lime from her lips.

"Your turn Scully," he said, after he had removed the piece of lime from his lips. "Mulder, I don't know. Usually if I drink tequila it doesn't stay down for long..."

"Aw, come on Scully. Live a little." His eyes gleamed mischieviously. "Fine." She sighed. She didn't want to let him in on her excitement.

She reached for a shot glass on the table and Mulder moved his chair yet closer to her own. She moved over hesitantly, deciding what to do.

She leaned down next to his neck and began licking all around there, getting all of the salt she could find. And there was more than needed because Mulder had begun to sweat. She straightened up and took the shot.

She came up sputtering and launched herself at the lime. Mulder didn't relent quite as easily as Scully had and she had to wrestle the lime away from him. She sucked on it, and when she was through, she pressed his lips to her own.

He suckled on her greddily, finding the taste of her mouth more intoxicating than anything. He could taste her under the tequila and the lime and a thrill ran through him. Her hands flew to the back of his head as she impossibly tried to deepen the kiss. They stayed like that for some moments before Mulder separated from her and began licking her earlobe.

She shuddered and drew in a shaky breath. He grabbed at her and pulled her in for another kiss before releasing her to down the shot. She picked up the wedge of lime and held it in her hand, ready for him. He pried it from her hand and sucked on it greedily. She moaned deep in her throat and began to rock her hips into him.

She looked around them to she if anyone's prying eyes were watchng their current activities but to her approval, there were none. She began to nibble on his ear, just as he had done to her. As she did so, his hand began to snake up under her dress.

She let out a shaky breath, but to his surprise, she didn't protest. He flicked his fingers inside of the wasteband of her panties and stroked her lightly.

"Ohhh, fuck Mulder."

"Mmm, Scully, can I really do this to you here?" He breathed into her ear. "Mmm, only if I can do this." She brought her hand up to his concealed erection and began to stroke him.

"Oh God Scully, if you don't stop I'm gonna come right here." He was astonished that he had actually said that to her face. He summed it up to all the alcohol that was in him and surrendered himself to her hand. She laughed a bit as she slowly unzipped the zipper on his white hospital pants.

"Oh, Scully, you could get us into a lot of trouble..."

"Mulder, shut up. I want to fuck you with my mouth." She was also slightly stunned that she had let those words from her lips, but she climbed down from her chair anyway.

She crawled under the table and slipped his aching cock from his boxers. Mulder let out a hissed breath and slumped down in his chair. Scully licked her lips and rimmed the head of his cock with them.

She groaned aloud as she began to pump him within her mouth. She licked his entire length and then sucked on his hard and he dropped his head and banged it on the table.

She took as much of him into her mouth as she could and began massaging his balls with her hands. She withdrew to the point that only the head was in her mouth and licked the pre-come off of it. She smile dwevilishly up at him but he couldn't see. His head was still on the table.

She kept licking the ead of his cock and when she began to feel him twitch, she went down on him again. After a few more moments, he made a strangled sound in the back of his throuat and Scully nearly swallowed him whole.

When she came up, she wiped her mouth and was astonished to realized that she didn't feel dirty or sluttish. She had always felt that way after giving that to a man... but not now. She smiled at him and he reached for her hand and pulled her to him.

He rested her forehead on his own and whispered: "Damn, I love you."

She laughed. She looked down at his lap and then back up into his eyes. He laughed and zippered up. Then he kissed her again.

"Hey Scully, let's get outta here."

"Okay, Mulder. As long as you don't try to eat me." She kissed the tip of his nose and grinned devilishly.

"Aw, damn Scully, looks like I'll have to fuck you then."

The End


Sorry to the non-smutaholics, but the next one won't be so... straight forward. It will be loving and shit. Okay? Okay. ~Leslie

Thanks: AS ALWAYS... to and in no particular order... Michelle who is the QUEEN of fic! Jeez, she does everything, thank you, thank you, thank you. To Aiah, who has never seen Saved By The Bell, to my twin EY who is a closet smut-a-holic, and to Ashley, who really REALLY helped me with this one. She's a self assured smut-a-holic and her cravings keep me going... even if these do suck ass! Oh yes Ash, you know you like it! Lisa says I should stop... so does Ms. A... am I whacked out for sending smut to my teacher??? NAH!! Michelle puts in all the nasty parts Ms. A! I swear!!!!

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