Title: The Divine Mr. Jerry Whetmore
Author: Myriss
Written: September 2001
Archiving: Ephemeral Okay I will forward to Gossamer myself. Okay for others but please let me know And keep my name and header attached.
Ratings Warning: PG
Classification: Fluff, PWP, Alternating POVs, This has *no smut!*|
Keywords: Implied MSR
Spoilers: Nothing really.
The Disclaimer: Any character you recognized from the t.v. series belongs to 1013 and Fox I am just borrowing them.

Summary: A man appears from Scully's past.


I was walking down the sidewalk when I ran across her I saw a flash of red hair as she passed by.

"Dana? Dana Scully?"

She stared at me, her eyes wide I knew then that Dana Scully had never gotten over me and our sweet summer of passion.

"Jerry... Jerry Whetmore?" she asked, her voice trembling with yearning.

Oh, baby I hear you Your dreams are about to come true.

"Why didn't you just say 'no'?" Mulder asked.

"He never gave me a chance," she protested.

"Well, just don't show up then."

She looked scandalized "That would be rude!"

He shook his head wryly at her Eighteen years of manners had been drilled into her head by Mrs. Margaret Scully.

She smiled suddenly.

"You're coming with me," she said.

Mulder thought she never looked so downright evil in her life.

Poor schmuck, I thought to myself I wasn't pleased to see him show up with Dana... whoever he was, he was a funny looking dude, too. Big nose. Big lips. Little chin. He probably never gotten laid in his life.

Dana introduced him to me He was her partner.

Wasn't she in the FBI?

I could see the longing in her eyes The pleading for understanding.

Oh, Dana, Dana I understand. You had to bring him with you.

Don't worry It does not matter.

Can you still feel it? The passion of that long ago summer? I do.

While Jerry Whetmore stepped out to use the restroom, Mulder leaned forward and said, amazed, "He is surprisingly articulate for someone with limited mouth movements."


"It's true I mean, you can only move your mouth only so much while still showing all your teeth."

"Mulder! Play nice!"

I didn't want to brag, of course.

"I was Mr. Beach 1980," I said "That's when we meet. On the beach." I tossed a smoldering look at Dana. "Don't you remember, Dana?"

She looked flushed I could tell she was remembering our summer of love. She whispered, full of longing, "Yes, Jerry."

I looked at the Mulder guy. Too bad she had to drag him with her to lunch. But I knew Dana had a tender heart. She couldn't hurt his feelings. It's obvious that he had it bad for Dana. The way he gazed at her... Of course, she was going to break his heart Poor schmuck.

"I can't believe you kissed Mr. Beach Bum 1980," Mulder whispered gleefully to her. "I'm so jealous!"

Her face turned bright red "Mulder, I was just a kid then!"

"Excuses," he said airily.

She scowled and growled, "Muuulllderr-"

Mr. Jerry Whetmore came back to the table. He sat back down and said to Scully, "Sorry, babe but some lady stopped me and gave me her a number...I didn't have the heart to refuse her." He winked at Mulder "You know how it is."

Mulder sat back and smiled "Oh yes," he said agreeably.

"But don't you worry, hon," Jerry said to Scully, "because my hear-"

"Ah, Jerry," Scully tried to say.

A cell phone rang. Three hands dipped in. Three cells phones flipped out.

Jerry smiled, his white, white teeth glinting under the fluorescent light "It's mine," he said "Excuse me-" He wandered off again.

Mulder leaned in and said, "So, Dana, tell me more about this hot summer romance that you had-"

"There's nothing to tell," she muttered darkly.

"He seems to think, otherwise-" Mulder waggled his brows.

"The most we did was kiss-"

"Ooooh, do tell."

Scully smacked him in the arm "You are so dead, Mulder!"

Mulder laughed "I can say, without doubt, your taste has improved-"

She smacked him again. "Well, not by much," she huffed, annoyed.

She was embarrassed. She couldn't figured out why she had fallen for the likes of Jerry Whetmore that summer years ago. Of course, he hadn't been so bad then.

He still had hair. And he had been cute...in the Blue Lagoonish way that was popular then.

She frowned at Mulder. He was enjoying himself way too much. You wouldn't be laughing if Phoebe Greene popped out of nowhere, she thought darkly.

Of course, she frowned, she wouldn't be too happy either. Mulder felt no way threaten by Jerry Whetmore, especially after meeting him Scully hadn't felt the same way about Phoebe.  

Jerry was telling them about his business and how much money he made when a familiar figure walked by, pushing a baby in a stroller.

Scully jumped up to her feet "Mom."

Mrs. Scully came to an abrupt halt "Dana?" she asked, surprised.

"Mrs. Scully!" Jerry stood up.

"Jay...Joh...Jer...Jerry? Jerry Whetmore?" Mrs. Scully looked at him, her daughter, then Mulder in confusion.

"It's me." Jerry smiled dazzlingly "I ran into Dana here. We decided to catch up on old times."

Scully leaned over the baby, picking him up and cooing at him. Then handed the baby over to Mulder.

"So who's this, Mrs. Scully?" Jerry said genially.

Mrs. Scully smiled "This is my grandson, William."

"William-" Jerry nodded again.

"William Fox Mulder," she went on. "Dana's and Fox's son."

Jerry Whetmore blinked "Dana's and Fox's...uhm...Mulder?...son."

"I'm surprised that they haven't mentioned Will yet?" Mrs. Scully said indulgently "It's their favorite subject."

"We haven't got a chance to talk about him yet, Mom," Mulder said.

"Well, I have to get going," Mrs. Scully said "I have a church meeting to attend."

"Mom," she said "Do you want us to take William?"

"Oh no," Mrs. Scully said "I still have to show him off. They haven't seen him yet." She watched fondly as Scully carefully strapped the baby back into his stroller and his parents kissed him good-bye.

"I'll see you two tonight for dinner," Mrs. Scully said. "And of course, Jerry, you are welcome to come, too." She smiled and wheeled the baby away.

Jerry looked at them, a puzzled crease down his forehead.

"So-" he cleared his throat "You two are...together."

"We're...uh, partners, like I said," Scully said.

"I...uhm...thought you were like...uh...work partners?"

"Mulder used to be my work partner. He's no longer with the FBI, though. He works as a consultant and a writer for an agency that specializes in discovering and reporting certain ...uh...covert...activities-"

"They publish a periodical...perhaps, you've heard of it? The Lone Gunmen," Mulder said smoothly.

"No," Jerry said, shaking his head "I haven't."

"They are rather specialized."

Jerry stared at them incredulously for a moment, then suddenly his eyes widen in shock He stepped back from them.

"Is something the matter, Jerry?" Scully asked.

"Don't get me wrong," Jerry Whetmore said, "I'm pretty much an open type of guy, you know-"

Mulder and Scully stared back at him.

"-but I have to draw a line somewhere," he went on, "I have to tell you that I'm not much into that type of scene-"

They glanced at each other, puzzled.

"I'm an uno-to-uno type of guy, you know," Jerry said, his hands gesturing back and forth "No, third parties." He pressed his hands to his chest. "I'm flattered, but no thanks-" and left hurriedly.

Mulder stared after Jerry Whetmore's rapidly retreating back Then he said to Scully, "Am I missing something here? But did he think...?"

Her eyes widened "I think so, Mulder."

For once, both were speechless at the same time.


Author's Notes -

Plot? What plot?

Highly improbable Lightweight Pretty silly. Jerry Whetmore is just an one dimension character. A plot device. Oh, I so agree! But I needed something light. All those negative vibes that those season nine spoilers have been giving out for future MSR...So I wrote this Hopefully, it is somewhat funny.

Constructive criticism always welcome.



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